


If Only You Could Admit

by InsaneJul



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Falling In Love, Love Confessions, Multi, Regrets, Requited Unrequited Love, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-09-03 06:16:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8700691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneJul/pseuds/InsaneJul
Summary: If only you could admit this is what you want.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaaand we're back to some hardcore pain. After all the Overwatch cuteness I've posted, this needed to get out.

            If only you could admit this is what you want.

           

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Tan skin darkened even more by years in the sun, on the beach, part of his face that used to be part of yours. If only you could admit his laugh is the most incredible sound. His presence is a given in your life, and without it, you would be lost. He’s the closest thing to properly loving you you’ve ever had. You’re too scared to admit it. You won’t ever give him up, not even for the thing you want most.

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Tall and lanky, far too pale, soft freckled skin replaced with cold hard metal. If only you could admit his tears of joy are the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. His presence is a given in your life, and without it, you would have no one to believe in. He’s the only person who really seems to care about you. You’re too scared to admit it. You won’t risk everything you could ever want. Who would?

 

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Hair graying at the temples and lines that shouldn’t fit on his too-young face. If only you could admit his relief and affection is like a blessing to you. He has been in your life for so long now, it seems impossible he would ever disappear, despite throwing his life on the line too many times. His courage and honesty are just so unbelievable. You’re too scared to tell him. What if he leaves?

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Deep brown skin paired with light green eyes, glowing in anger like his sword. If only you could admit his stupid pick-up lines make you smile when you have smiled far too little in this life. He has been in your life for so long now, it seems impossible he would ever leave, despite his growing courage and selflessness. You’re too scared to tell him. You would much prefer watching him continue to become the man you know he can be to watching him leave you.

 

            If only you could admit she is what you want. A blonde ponytail and generous smile concealing beautiful rage caged within a metal skeleton. If only you could admit her anger is far superior to her absence. You have dragged her from the hands of death just to be in her presence once more. It’s wonderful, but at what cost? You’re too scared to let her go. Your life would be meaningless without her.

            If only you could admit he was what you wanted. Green eyes behind thick-rimmed glasses, anger masking a vast intellect. If only you could admit his kiss dissipated all your pain. His love made you whole. But he has held onto you too tightly, and the only thing you can truly admit is you no longer want him. You’re too scared to tell him how you used to love him. Then he would never let you go.

 

            If only you could admit she is what you want. Gorgeous green eyes, a fiery red head that mirrors her personality. If only you could admit you wish you could run away with her. You have trained beside her so long, remaining silent and reining in everything you want to give her. It is easy to pretend nothing will change, the way things are now. You're too scared to say you love her. She doesn’t love you back.

            If only you could admit he is what you want. The crooked grin, scarred face, and infectious laugh that could fill any sized room. If only you could admit his sincerity means the world to you. He has been your friend, but space between you is full of words neither of you will say. He cannot be yours. You're too scared to oppose the powers that be. Your duty is far more important.

 

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Large, powerful, intimidating, punctuated with a soft ponytail. If only you could admit his annoyance at you draws you further in. Partners, for so long, nothing more. You don’t have to give him up, not if you don’t want to. You can control him, and maybe you regret it, but he’s still by your side and that’s what matters. You're too scared to find out whether he’s here because he wants to be or because you have manipulated him. He’s here, and that’s what matters.

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Scrawny, flexible, and sarcastic, quick to anger and sardonicism. If only you could admit that ridiculous attitude is attractive to you. He’s been your partner for years, but maybe you could have asked for more. He doesn’t matter so much anymore, only a reminder of the things you want to forget every waking minute, and yet you can’t seem to shake him off. You’re too scared to leave him. You don’t know what the world without him is like anymore.

 

            If only you could admit he is what you want. Almost pallid expression dusted with freckles and decorated with horn-rimmed glasses. If only you could admit his strengths are perfectly complementary to yours. Together, you are learning, if you work together, you could accomplish anything. But it’s far easier to remain angry. You're too scared to accept him as he truly is. Then he is gone, and you regret everything you said to him.

            If only you could admit she is what you want. Deep dark eyes set in equally dark skin and cropped black hair to keep it out of her way. If only you could admit you admire her more than any human being you’ve ever met. Her courage is inspiring, her military prowess humbling, her beauty inside and out unparalleled. But she doesn’t want you, and why would she? You’re not capable of a fraction of what she can do. You’re too scared to confess that you’re falling for her. She is the source of your courage, at the end, but you still don’t tell her this.

 

            If only we could admit what we wanted.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm very sorry.


End file.
